Sunday, March 15, 2009

Sometimes you just have to cry

I had a pitty party last night. I haven't had one in awhile, so I guess it was time.

A dear friend is suffering, and I don't know what to do for them. I have prayed for them, and will continue to do so. I have reached out by telephone, and by visiting, and maybe that helps for a minute, but there is a terrible truth about hard times; they have to be experienced and endured for a season.

I have been there. I have walked through misery so deep that I felt it was almost something that could be touched. I have seen days that lasted for years, when every sky was gray. I have felt anger so profound that it frightened me. I have tasted dispair, not able to ever get it out of my mouth.

Last night, I thought all that my friend is going through, and I could only cry. Not just little tears, but as a famous talk show hostess puts it, 'The Ugly Cry', when your face swells and your nose runs, and all that nasty stuff.

Before I could leave my own years of hell, when I first drew close to God, He softened my heart. For years, I could have cared less what others felt, and now, I feel it all. I can only wonder how our Heavenly Father feels when he watches our suffering. If it hurt me that much to see my friend suffer, how must God feel when He sees everyone who He loves in pain? I just can't begin to imagine.

When I finally left dispair behind in my own life, God gave me what I think of as my life scripture; Isaiah 54:6-17. I believe that on the day it was given to me, God made covenant with me, and gave me this promise.

"This is like the days of Noah to me: just as I swore that the waters of Noah would never again go over the earth, so I have sworn that I will not be angry with you and will not rebuke you. For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you, and my covenant of peace shall not be removed, says the Lord, who has compassion on you."(Isaiah 54:9-10)

To my suffering friend I can only wish "No weapon that is fashioned against you shall prosper, and you shall confute every tongue that rises against you in judgement."(Isaiah 54:17)

I can only pray that God wraps my friend in a cloud of love and compassion to protect her, and that she will gain some comfort as she walks through this terrible time in the knowledge that her Lord and her friends walk beside her.



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